"'Truth is strange," you know, "stranger than fiction' - besides being more to the point" - Edgar Allan Poe

August 10, 2007

I subscribe to a few daily mailing lists, notably Warren Ellis' BAD SIGNAL, and the WSJ OpinionJournal BEST OF THE WEB TODAY by James Taranto. Of the latter, I must say it's the best reading I get to do on a daily basis. A lot of it is US-Politics based, so I might not relate completely, but it's a fabulous read anyway. I'd like to share one item I just read in today's edition.

How Much Is That Doggess in the Window?
"The New York City Council, which drew national headlines when it passed a symbolic citywide ban earlier this year on the use of the so-called n-word, has turned its linguistic (and legislative) lance toward a different slur: bitch," reports the New York Times:

The term is hateful and deeply sexist, said Councilwoman Darlene Mealy of Brooklyn, who has introduced a measure against the word, saying it creates "a paradigm of shame and indignity" for all women. . . .

The measure, which 19 of the 51 council members have signed onto, was prompted in part by the frequent use of the word in hip-hop music.

As a New York-based wordsmith, we are of course vexed by the City Council's efforts to restrict our vocabulary. Fortunately, the Times suggests an alternative to "bitch," in the form of a definition from an 1811 dictionary: "A she dog, or doggess; the most offensive appellation that can be given to an English woman."

"Doggess." That seems to work: "She's such a doggess." "Life's a doggess, then you die." "I can't say it, but it rhymes with roggess."

But the Times notes that "the bill also bans the slang word 'ho.' " Great. What are we supposed to say instead of "ho"? "Gigoless"?


Funny, funny stuff, if not outright biting at times. And they spot the funniest headlines ever.
For example (also from today's edition)-

News You Can Use

  • "Keep Poop Out of Pools, Residents Told"--headline, Daily Herald (Provo, Utah), Aug. 9

  • "Relief From Excessive Armpit Sweating"--headline, NewsMax.com, Aug. 8

  • "Hips: Scheme to Widen in Five Weeks, Say Lobbyists"--headline, Financial Times, Aug. 3

Bottom Stories of the Day

  • "Segway Fan Club Disbands Due to Lack of Interest"--healdine, FoxNews.com, Aug. 9

  • "Joan Jett Won't Be at the State Fair"--headline, Pioneer Press (St. Paul, Minn.), Aug. 8

  • "Pakistan Parade Could Be in Doubt"--headline, New York Sun, Aug. 9

  • "Angelina Jolie Denies Endorsing Edwards"--headline, CNN.com, Aug. 9

  • "Leonardo DiCaprio's Presidential Vote Up for Grabs"--headline, People, Aug. 9

  • "Canadian PM Vows to Defend Arctic"--headline, CNN.com, Aug. 9
I recommend it to anyone. Here.