"'Truth is strange," you know, "stranger than fiction' - besides being more to the point" - Edgar Allan Poe

July 10, 2006

*standard disclaimer* please don't use this, Mr. T3rrori5t.

I could get into trouble for this, but I'm saying it anyway. I'm certain somebody has thought of it before, but it's a conspiracy theory that I need to say out loud.

Fact 1- It's not such a good idea to plan terrorist attacks on government buildings. The security's too high, and you kill off 2 old farts, there are 4 more ready to take their place.

Fact 2- Terror and fear are not caused by psyching out politicians, but by psyching out people. Which is *probably* how Dubya's kept his seat for 2 terms. Is why 9/11 was such an effective terror attack, no? Simple, direct, and blew 6 billion minds!

Fact 3- There is one MAJOR binding factor that a lot of the educated/ civilized/ working/ scare-worthy people depend on daily, for large periods of time, and would panic if it fell apart. The bloody internet.

So here's the idea -

Bomb Google. Take out their search engine servers. Blogspot too. A couple of ISPs, say Comcast too. The security isn't as great as, for example airports or the pentagon, and it would be easy to smuggle C4 in. (C4 is a word I've learnt watching too many english movies. Apparently no other explosive passes the hollywood standard. whatever). Make sure slashdot goes down too.

Get the picture? Panic. Not too many lives lost, but the message is through.

There's a TomClancy novel in this somewhere, I know it.

Am I wrong here? Could somebody tell me if this theory is just the result of me being single and desperate, or do I have a future career as an anarchist?

Er, not that I want to.

[this post has no intention of encouraging any form of terrorist activity. None. Zero. Be good citizens, or I'll kick your ass.]


Prasanna said...

You said it. The explosive is always C4! Or some stupid EED or AED! Goddammit!

byker7 said...


a humble addendum... why leave microsoft and intel out? their feelings might be hurt.

as for C4? well it's ok. but it's tough to source. rdx, on the other hand, the czech semtex knoxk off, is cheap and available at your nearest erstwhile east bloc outlet... where, the cognoscenti tell me, a nuke is no big deal for the relatively well heeled.

Pi said...

Microsoft and Intel being pushed off the earth is like whacking Bush and Blair. It'll start a bloody renaissance and the world will be a better place to be. Think about it.

Oh, and apparently it's not that tough to get the boomshakalaka together. It's even ISO 9000, you'll notice.

Or we can try unconventional methods, if it boils down to that.

priya said...

someone took a leaf outta your blog.... pity they only followed facts 1 and 2.

Pi said...

Hey Priya. Yeah, I'd rather they hadn't done anything at all.