"'Truth is strange," you know, "stranger than fiction' - besides being more to the point" - Edgar Allan Poe

March 14, 2005

The Ranting Konka

I did not write this with the intention of publishing it. It is NOT meant to be read. Comments are welcome, just don't bust my ass about it. dB, will write for you soon. Have faith.

I do not blog to comment on world issues. Or about the latest movies, books, whatever. Neither do I blog to 'network', or advertise myself. I don't believe blogging MUST be used as a public tool. This is my space. Darned if I'm told how to lead my life here.

Therefore, you snooty bastards, (that's right, I'm talking to you, bunch of middle aged halfwit uneducated illiterate losers stuck in the same loop of time your age has thrown at you)I don't appreciate you telling me that you don't see literary merit in my blog. I don't give a fuck. Judge me for all I am, not for who I become in my own privacy. 'PRIVACY'- Get it? You are not my friend, and I never mentioned that you were. Stay away. I can be quite mean, vengeful, and pretty darned evil once I get pissed.

Look, a butterfly. Calming effect...

Better. Now then, you still reading?

Most things that happen in our lives (sorry, 'my' life) are beyond personal control anyway. Just when you think the dust is settling down on one beautiful past, there comes the untimely (yet appropriately movielike) arrival of yet another life changing phenomenon. One that's about 5 1/2 feet tall, to be precise. Have delayed writing this blog for a while, but it's driving me crazy. Decorum, protocol, consequence- these three words can come back after the storm's over.

Point is, I cannot spend five minutes alone with my thoughts anymore. Is it so difficult to believe that you've become a 24 hr obsession? I don't think so, and I'd rather that this go away. Fast. Was much better solitude with just me in my head. And the company that I need from you demands a personal distance of a few feet, not the buzzing of a phone.

What future this holds, I wonder. Terribly uncomfortable with it right now, that's all.

And why is V_ at the back of my mind?

When people ask me who my best friend is, I smartly change topics. I need a shrink.

I am, therefore I think. Screw you, Descartes.


Realization- I know stuff about men. Very scholarly level of ken. I can characterize a guy by speaking one sentence with the person. This leads to a lot of trouble. People don't like analyzed. Case in point- Myself. Ever noticed how strange it feels looking into your own eyes in a mirror? And that we don't do it that often, until the end when, I'm sure, you freeze for just one moment and realize the silliness of it all.

"Someday you'll find someone who's crazy about you"... Thanks a lot A_, but hope simply bores me now. I see no hope in hoping. A dangerous habit, wanting something you're never sure of getting. Leads to meaningless rants on blogspot.


Dad, oh dad, when will you see I'm not young anymore? Worse, that I hate being old.

Look, another butterfly...

"I would like you to know that if you're ever single in the future and you want to come visit me in california I would be open to spending time with you and finding out how old you were when you wrote your first song"
Alanis, Unsent.

What a line. If a woman told me this, I'd be her slave for life.


citrus said...

*poke* *prod*

The Agony Aunt said...

@Citrus- still no luck?

citrus said...

*puts hands up in the air and yells* 'nothing'*looks around*'nothing!'

ps: no pressure :P

Kini said...

oye you mother and half....post something and stop acting like a non existent bhosadpappu!